December 14, 2006

If you don’t already read Regret the Error, the blog of Newspaper (and other media) Corrections, this is a great place to start: The Best Corrections/Worst Error of 2006.

…we incorrectly used the word “pubic? instead of “public?…

…40 percent of women say, ?We both love any and all animals? when asked, ?How kinky are you??

…has been referred to correctly in The Times more than 500 times since 1980 and incorrectly more than 120 times…

…the paper would not be running a correction because it?s impossible to define what is real and what isn?t when it comes to wrestling…

…a mistake worthy of lifelong shame, somehow confusing Neil Simon with Eugene O?Neill…

…one or two canned chilies, not one or two cans…

…it was incorrectly stated that she ate “Twenty-six, seven, eight thousand calories a day.? The correct figures are six, seven, eight thousand…

…pot growers had tapped into an irrigation line… to grow the cannibals…

…the Sabres outshit the Senators 32-28…

And look for the shocking revelations that (a) Supreme Court Justice Alito shot Pope John Paul II, (b) LSD guru Timothy Leary discovered a new primary color called “gendale”, and (c) tens of thousands of worker bees are commanded by Queen Elizabeth. Plus some serious stuff about the year’s worst press errors (some you may not have even known were wrong). There I go getting serious again. I’d better get a supply of laughing gas along with my eye bleach…

An unwanted email got through my spam filter with a subject line that went beyond the usual non-sequiturity into true absurdist humor (in other words, it made me laugh – btw, I know ‘non-sequiturity’ is not a real word, but isn’t it apprpriate? – but I digress).

He was successful, but ended up nailing an ottoman with his head.

This incredible bit of random generated comedy prompted me to do two totally unnecessary things today.

1: Check my spam filter depository for other good laughs. That was a mistake. I need to go to the drugstore to replenish my supply of eye bleach.

2: Since this was one of those “penny-stock spams” (I’ve already mentioned how futile it is to send them to my asset-less self), check out the performance of that stock… Well, it closed last night at $1.31, the price quoted in the email (with a short-term target of $2.75 and long-term target of $4.15). It opened today at $1.45… and closed at $1.25. My conclusion? If I did have any money to invest, I’d short-sell the stocks mentioned in these emails… as I am sure the spammers already have.

Gee, a WendellWit post with a practical message. I must be coming down with something again.