"Spam Scam With Ottoman"

2006
Dec
14

An unwanted email got through my spam filter with a subject line that went beyond the usual non-sequiturity into true absurdist humor (in other words, it made me laugh – btw, I know ‘non-sequiturity’ is not a real word, but isn’t it apprpriate? – but I digress).

He was successful, but ended up nailing an ottoman with his head.

This incredible bit of random generated comedy prompted me to do two totally unnecessary things today.

1: Check my spam filter depository for other good laughs. That was a mistake. I need to go to the drugstore to replenish my supply of eye bleach.

2: Since this was one of those “penny-stock spams” (I’ve already mentioned how futile it is to send them to my asset-less self), check out the performance of that stock… Well, it closed last night at $1.31, the price quoted in the email (with a short-term target of $2.75 and long-term target of $4.15). It opened today at $1.45… and closed at $1.25. My conclusion? If I did have any money to invest, I’d short-sell the stocks mentioned in these emails… as I am sure the spammers already have.

Gee, a WendellWit post with a practical message. I must be coming down with something again.

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