"And Oscar Is a Boring Name #boringmovietitles"

2009
Feb
16

Ana Marie Cox is a blogger, writer, ex-Wonkette, political party animal, D.C. sweetie, one of the most famous people to share initials with a cable TV channel (and BHO comes SO close) and now, one of the Twitterati. One of the people who can create a subject of discussion just by putting a “#” in front of it, making it a Twitter Hashtag. (If you don’t understand, don’t even try).

And on a Sunday in the middle of a three-day weekend, she gave us #boringmovietitles, which, for lack of a better explanation are titles that are simple references to things that are less interesting than the what the movie is about.

Example: “Home Alone”. If you didn’t know what happens in that movie, you wouldn’t expect anything to happen in that movie. Well, by just bringing up the concept, she inspired dozens of Twittering fools to come up with examples, and inspired me to survey a list of the 1000 Biggest Moneymaking Movies Evah! for boringness…

I will try to give credit where credit is due, but the following are the best of what I found attached to the #hashtag (THAT’s what makes the # important). Any duplicates were deleted in favor of whoever first suggested the title (if I did this right).

@anamariecox: “Transporter” subject of running joke with @lehmannchris [husband IRL not just Twitter] for most boringest movie name ever. Competes with “Apt Pupil.”

@DukeStJournal: How about “The Reader”?

@roadkillrefugee: [disqualified for making up silly titles of non-existent movie]

amc: “The Professional” also.

@sashaundercover: You just mean marginally #boringmovietitles not really bad like “Speed Racer” or “Red Dawn”

@ FifthFloorTom: “The Happening” [almost lost because he used the nonstandard #boringassmovietitles tag]

amc: Husband suggests “Jumper,” which sounds like the story of a sweater, as well.

@stonermc: “Clerks,” “The Missionary,” “Fire,” “The Village, “Dune,” Driving Miss Daisy,” “Diner,” “The Cooler,” “Misery,” “Beaches,” “The Wall,” “The L shaped Room”

@gtfourier: How bout “Taken”

@bwvalentine: “The Constant Gardener” has to be among the most boring movie titles ever conceived.

@g: Have you already considered all John Grisham books-to-screen? The Firm, The Client, The Rainmaker, etc.

@WeeLaura: Does “The Tailor of Panama” qualify as a boring movie title? Or just boring to me?

@MarkWAdams: “Being There” great movie, but title just … is.

@OKnox: “Ordinary People”

@lechatsavant: Would “Interiors” count too?

@TeresaKopec: “The Shop Around the Corner”, “The Fly”

@theonetruebix: “The Color Purple”

@AMF7: “Twilight,” “Lakeview Terrace,” “The Duchess,” “The Women,” “American Teen”

amc: #boringmovietitles harder than #wonkpickuplines [a previous amc twittermeme]. What counts? “Absence of Malice” is a legal term but malice inherently interesting.

@ObeliskToucher: “On the Beach”

@patrickkeller: “Milk” sounds like a documentary about dairy farming that you had to watch in junior high science class.

@myrnatheminx: “The Car”

@houx: “The Room,” “Secretary,” “The Pelican Brief” come to mind. “The Firm” is more #wonkpickuplines

@markowitz: “Husbands and Wives”,”Network”, “The Chase”, “Coming Home” and/or “Mary”?

@Fritinancy: “Love Story.” [somebody had to say it but it wasn’t going to be me]

@chutry: “Fool’s Gold,” “Office Space,” “Dazed and Confused.”

@Kaplan: “The Wood,” “The Transporter,” “D.A.R.Y.L.”

[this was the point where I discovered and hijacked the meme]
Unfortunately, my birthday movie, “September 30, 1955” probably qualifies in the oft-twittered category of #boringmovietitles…
“Cars” “Signs” “Rush Hour” (think about it!) “Mr. and Mrs. Smith” “Home Alone” “The Day After Tomorrow” “Nine to Five” “Eraser”

@SteffChilds: “Heathers”

@yoink7: “It” “Made” “He Was A Quiet Man” “Big Nothing” “Silent Movie” “Helvetica”

@charliesdad: “The Brave One” “Contact” … Nothing against Jodie Foster … “Legend” and “The Game”

@jeremymeyers: “Broadcast News” (that ones for you @anamariecox)

@stonermc: “The L Shaped Room,” “K
rakatoa: East of Java,” “If It’s Tuesday, This Must Be Belgium”

me: “Collateral” (especially if you’re a banker), “The Others”, tempted to go with “Dead Poets Society”, “Holes”, “The Butterfly Effect”, and what about “Quantum of Solace”, boring or just confusing?

@JBD1: Also “The Phone Booth”

@DeffoTotes: “Now and Then” “Always”

@roadkillrefugee: “The Piano”, “The Notebook”, and “Airport” (plus “Airport 77 and Airport 79”)

@jillinski: “K-Pax,” “Mamma Mia,” “John Q”

@lechatsavant: “The Apartment”, “The Birds” (good movie), “The Conversation”

@katemc432: “My Brother Sam is Dead” gives it all away from the beginning. also “The Two Towers”

@Josh_Shear: “Cocoon”, “The Doors”

@MatthewGCarroll: in retrospect the title for “The Matrix” is awfully dull.

@Morningsidemom: “Failure to Launch” is the least “chic flick” sounding name out there – sounds more like a BORING rocket documentary.

@InsultComicDog “Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever” [this one may belong more to #movietitlesthatmakenosenseinanylanguage]

@AdrianUribarri: “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” and “To Wong Foo Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar.” Just kidding! [come on, this is a serious subject, isn’t it?]

@triumph68: “My Left Foot”, “The Terminal”, “Longest Road”, “The Faculty”, “One Hour Photo”

@MimAbbyMason: “Deadly Boring” [good find of an obscure movie, with documentation]

@sashaundercover: “Brick” is a pretty boring title

@ErikRedin: How about “Serenity?” I love Joss Whedon, but it’s the brand name of adult diapers. Also, “The Rock.” Just checked IMDB, there’s actually a movie called “Dust.”

@LaFaucon: “300”

@bcubbison: “Joe” “Dave” “Bill” [an every other movie title that is just a common first name… you missed “Ray”]

@InsultComicDog: Coming Soon: Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience [Bad dog! I said no jokes!]

@nurble: “LA Story,” “White?”

@phil_iott: what about “The International?”

@slurrrrpee: “Ed Wood?” [now they’re getting rather tentative…]

@ChristinaRoo: “The Station Agent”. Also wins for weirdest ever blurb on Dish guide. [documentation not provided]

@FifthFloorTom: I think we should all agree that the boringest movie title is “The Thing”. Then we can just move on with our lives. [I agree.]

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