"The Day Before Christmas"

2007
Dec
24

‘Twas the day before Christmas, and down here at work
Not a creature was stirring, not even a clerk;

Christmas cards hung in the lobby in bunches,
And in the lunch room where we rarely ate lunches;

The executives nestled all behind closed doors,
While visions of year-end they tried to ignore;

And I with my Accountant’s green eyeshade half-kilter,
Had just gone online to check out MetaFilter,

When up from the warehouse there arose such a din,
I thought Shipping had collided with Receiving again.

Away from the window that my office lacked,
Past the Founder’s portrait that covered a crack,

I bolted downstairs with a stride never broken
Past the No Smoking sign where the smokers were smokin’,

And, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
Were all of the vendors we’d bought from this year,

With one out in front, so gnome-like and short,
I knew he had to be our IT support.

More numerous than tribbles, their small gifts they came,
And all of them marked with their company’s names;

On pens and on pencils, on mugs and on mousepads!
On business card holders and various doo-dads!

On datebooks and calendars, both desk and wall,
And they didn’t stop ’til they’d distributed all.

They spoke nary a word, but worked on like dogs,
Covering Purchasing’s desks with their new catalogs,

And once everything they had brought was delivered,
They turned toward the door like the flow of a river;

I asked one why they would be leaving so soon,
He just said “12 more offices to hit before noon”;

But I heard them exclaim, as they left in a huff,
“Merry Christmas to all, and please buy our stuff.”

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